Two for one Unsounded special!

[righthandmage]

ELKA!
-1-

[Talking about random crap over drinks.]

So what about you? I saw you eyeing that little blond number over there in the corner. Personally I like someone with a bit more meat on their bones, but everyone's got their own weird desires am I right?

You should totally go over there. Say hi. Worst you'll get is beer in your hair. Best you'll get is a little hmm hmm hmm hey hey.

Eh? Eh?

-2-

[Just as you were trying to escape (From getting arrested, or paying your share of the bill, or whatever other situation you might not want to deal with), Elka shouted something in the First Tongue that switched the solidity of an iron stove with the flexibility of your pants. All of the sudden, your trousers are stiff as metal, while the stove collapses into a limp heap.]

You're not going anywhere! We've still got things to discuss.

DUANE!
-1-

[Duane Adelier: Well known scribe and spellwright. Whether you need a document transcribed in a language you don't know, or an item enchanted, rumor has it he is very skilled. However, for some reason, he doesn't have much repeat business. People who talk about him always look slightly uneasy, though they can't exactly explain why. But fuck it. You're not gonna let some nervous rumors stop you from going to see him.

His shop is decorated in a green and gold theme, and the man himself greets you warmly enough when you enter. But there IS something slightly...OFF, about his face, and it certainly is odd that he wears a hood even indoors on a cloudy day.]

Welcome. What can I do for you?

-2-

[Your recent exploits with Duane have left you both stained with more than a little bit of human blood. Duane is staring at his befouled gloves, his face a sickening mix of disgust and hunger.]

God damn you. But for you we never would have been in such a compromising situation in the first place. I'm going to have to throw out all of these clothes. The smell never truly leaves them.

[Is this accusation fair? Possibly. Possibly not. Either way, Duane isn't at his most rational right now.

Comments

duane 1

[grimly]

Oh, hullo!

[ casual glance around the room. interesting, very interesting. ]

You're just the bloke I was looking for. [ conspiratorially ] Have you got anything that would turn trousers into mice? Someone else's trousers, that is. I'd like to keep my own trousers just the way they are, nicely round my legs and everything.

[metaphorical_snakes]

Pants...into mice.

I suppose that would be...theoretically within the realm of possibility. It would be extraordinarily complicated, though.

[grimly]

Well, all you've got to do is transfigure the essences of clothes into the essence of mouse. It doesn't have to be live mice, so you haven't got to add the essence of living into the mix, which is the hard part, really.

[metaphorical_snakes]

Do you mind if I ask why you want to transmute someone's trousers into mice?

[grimly]

Erm. Because he's a greasy wanker? [ you mean that isn't a reasonable thing to ask for? ]

[metaphorical_snakes]

You want me to push the boundaries of spell composing for a practical joke on someone you don't like.

[grimly]

Yep.

[metaphorical_snakes]

[Deep sigh. He didn't even technically need to breathe these days, but sometimes you need to sigh regardless of your physiological needs.]

Well. I suppose the results will be worth recording regardless of the worthiness of the cause.

[grimly]

Brilliant. I'm glad your morality is suppressed by your natural curiosity! [ dazzling grin ] How does it work? Potion? Ancient amulet? Enchanted cupcake? Can you have it ready in a fortnight?

[metaphorical_snakes]

It will be a matter of learning all the aspects of a mouse that need to be transferred to your poor victim's trousers.

And of catching a mouse, but that should not be terribly difficult. Simplicity itself next to the former task.