Loki Laufeyson (
hates_thunder) wrote in
testrun_box2012-10-14 10:07 pm
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[General voice test]
1. 
[You've ended up with a Norse God as a roommate, under whatever circumstances causes these things to happen. He comes and goes when he pleases, eats everything in sight and hasn't even got the decency to get fat, and hits on your girlfriend/boyfriend/what-have-you. He also keeps the place spotless. Obsessively so. Oh, but that's not the worst part. The worst part is that ever since he's moved in, things have been replaced with other things, devices have malfunctioned, hot and cold water have switched... is he doing this or has he just got some kind of an area-effect chaos field?]
[Why not ask him? He's right over there, raiding the refrigerator. Again.]
2.
[YOU'VE BEEN LOKI'D AGAIN!]
[Damnit, not another prank! And this one was terribly elabourate, too, involving no less than seven supposedly erroneous phone calls, three different instances of malfunctioning chairs, and a mouse. A MOUSE. He's gone too far, this time!]
3.
[Oh, hey, person from Prompt One... wait. What the hell? It's been quiet. Too quiet. Everything is back where it belongs, everything works, your SO hasn't heard a peep, and, well, the place isn't quite so spotless any more. There's even food in the fridge! Loki is over there, on the sofa, apparently sulking. If you go over and say something to him, there's a pause... and then he looks up at you. And grins.]
[There's that sinking feeling. You've been Loki'd. YET AGAIN. OH. GOD. DAMNIT.]
4.
(Obligatory srs post)
[Things got out of control. Someone's gotten hurt or, worse, killed because of him. He's... quiet. Maybe even worried. But it's clear he doesn't regret his actions. There's no remorse at all, and he's almost disgustingly optimistic. Why? Just... why?]
[You've ended up with a Norse God as a roommate, under whatever circumstances causes these things to happen. He comes and goes when he pleases, eats everything in sight and hasn't even got the decency to get fat, and hits on your girlfriend/boyfriend/what-have-you. He also keeps the place spotless. Obsessively so. Oh, but that's not the worst part. The worst part is that ever since he's moved in, things have been replaced with other things, devices have malfunctioned, hot and cold water have switched... is he doing this or has he just got some kind of an area-effect chaos field?]
[Why not ask him? He's right over there, raiding the refrigerator. Again.]
2.
[YOU'VE BEEN LOKI'D AGAIN!]
[Damnit, not another prank! And this one was terribly elabourate, too, involving no less than seven supposedly erroneous phone calls, three different instances of malfunctioning chairs, and a mouse. A MOUSE. He's gone too far, this time!]
3.
[Oh, hey, person from Prompt One... wait. What the hell? It's been quiet. Too quiet. Everything is back where it belongs, everything works, your SO hasn't heard a peep, and, well, the place isn't quite so spotless any more. There's even food in the fridge! Loki is over there, on the sofa, apparently sulking. If you go over and say something to him, there's a pause... and then he looks up at you. And grins.]
[There's that sinking feeling. You've been Loki'd. YET AGAIN. OH. GOD. DAMNIT.]
4.
(Obligatory srs post)
[Things got out of control. Someone's gotten hurt or, worse, killed because of him. He's... quiet. Maybe even worried. But it's clear he doesn't regret his actions. There's no remorse at all, and he's almost disgustingly optimistic. Why? Just... why?]
3
It was the tone of someone very, very long-suffering, and the reason for it was obvious to anyone seeing him enter the room. It was in the eyes, mostly, the mental checklist anyone living with Loki for any length of time went through. Check the door for buckets, floor for tripwires, ceiling for...well, just in case. Checking, testing, checking again.
Jeff sighs, closing his eyes and pinching the bridge of his nose. "I don't suppose we can just skip to the gloating and maniacal laughter? Would that be too much to ask?"
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Lovely. Now he's feeding off the anticipation. There's a manic glint to his eyes, almost like an addict riding a high.
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And truthfully he's no warier than usual. OCD-level caution is simply one of the many side effects of sharing a room with Loki. It's reflexive, like the twitch that inevitably develops beneath the left eye after any length of time with the god.
His laptop is with him, he knows better than to let it out of his sight, though even that doesn't always help. He doesn't bother with his desk; by this point the bloody thing has more booby traps than featured in the entire Vietnam war. "And no, I'm not going to try to figure out what you're up to. I am not giving you the satisfaction."
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"Whyever not?" he asks, eyes glittering. "If you don't, you might be caught a little too unawares."
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[Fidgets.]
[Gets up and starts pacing.]
[Back and forth he goes, his hands twitchy, and his gaze boring into the back of Jeff's head.]
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He can hear him though, getting more and more agitated behind him. And he tries very hard not to smile.
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pace pace pace pace.
pace pa--He comes to a somehow audible halt.
"...You're enjoying this, aren't you?"
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There it is again.
And a miniscule pop. An infinitesimal snap. Keep pounding at that keyboard, Jeff, and you'll find out what those noises mean.
Meanwhile, Loki resumes pacing.
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Creak.
"..."
Pop. Creeeeaaak.
"...Oh no."
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[And when the noise finally dies down with the obligatory tiny sounds and small round things rolling away there's the sound of someone trying very hard not to laugh.]
[And failing.]
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"I. Hate. You. So. Much."
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I know you do. I know.
1
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Oh, no, but he is.
[He gestures behind the other man. If Elodin turns, he'll see another Loki causally walk away through the nearby wall. Like y'do.]
Always ambling through walls and upsetting things... I suppose he thinks it's funny to wear my face.
[He says all of this with a straight, if mildly affronted, face.]
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I can normally tell. They're pretty obvious about it if you know what to look for, but...
[He trails off, like he's lost track of the conversation.]
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But what?
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Catch.
[Elodin tossed something small and shiny towards Loki 1.]
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[And that's his first mistake, isn't it?]
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Well that answers that. What are you then?
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Among Midgardians I was thought of as a god.
1
[Shinji was trying to cook dinner until interrupted by one of Loki's standby prank traps, hes still covered in flour and wielding a rolling pin.]
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Hmm? Oh, certainly. What's on your mind?
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you know perfectly well what im talking about.
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[He dips a finger into the marshmallow fluff and sticks said finger into his mouth. The man eats so much sugar it's a wonder he hasn't fallen over in a diabetic coma by now but, well, clearly Jotunar have invincible pancreases.]
Why don't you tell me, that way we'll both know what you're talking about.