Brave New World potential

[dontsalute]

-1-
[Detritus stands in front of a crowd of people, holding an official proclamation in one hand and a siege crossbow with a 3000 pound draw in the other. As he just pulled it back with one hand, people seem inclined to listen to him. They're having trouble paying TOO much attention, though, as they keep getting distracting by the little creaking noises his weapon makes under stress.]

Now listen here you lot! Dis here is a royal prok-low-mashun. Dat means I gots to read it and youse gots to listen up toot sweet.

[He peers owlishly at the first sentence.]

By or.....der of de...

hey, what's dis word here?

-2-
[After being threatened by a rather impressively angry tirade from a man with a sword, Detritus reached out and, with one hand, bent the sword into a pretzel and then pushed the man's head through a wall.]

Don't worry. Dey tol' me all about police brutality, so I choose a very fin wall.

-3-
[After getting used to Detritus being dumb as a sack of bricks, fate has thrown both of you into an abandoned, dark, and above all COLD cavern.]

My word...I do feel like I am properly cogitating for once. What an extraordinary experience.

Comments

2

[fermionprincess]

How very thoughtful of you, sir troll!

[A comment comes from the short-statured young woman who was actually in the middle of being mugged (and not too bothered about it, strangely enough) before Detritus came along.]

Thanks to your intervention, it does seem that my first experience with the local criminal element draws to a close. How exciting!

[dontsalute]

[He got the first bit. The second had too many long words and so was mentally edited out of the conversation.]

Tiny ting like you shouldn't be down here in The Shades. Dangerous.

[fermionprincess]

Oh? Is it really that dangerous, sir troll? I was not challenged to a duel to the death even once.

[dontsalute]

Naw, they don' mess around with tings like dat here. Mostly they jus' try to kill you an' take your wallet.

[fermionprincess]

Oh. How rude of them - it is fortuitous that you came along, then. I would hate if someone got hurt.

[Alessandra glances at the local element, still embedded in the well.]

[dontsalute]

You mean besides him?

[fermionprincess]

Oh. Compared to what would happen should the encounter not be interrupted? That does not really count.

[dontsalute]

You probably right.

Come along, den. I shall perform my duty as a watchman an' escort you to a more gentile neighborhood.

[fermionprincess]

How very polite! Let us go then, I believe I had enough of the local color for now.

Perhaps I shall encounter a licensed thief the next time, instead!

[dontsalute]

You want to meet a licensed thief?

[fermionprincess]

It would be quite a unique experience, would it not?

[dontsalute]

[One moment, please. Processing information...

...

...

...

..!]

Ah. No, it happens all de time.

[fermionprincess]

Oh.

I suppose the advertisements were telling the truth, then.

3

[bejustorbedead]

[Ky shuddered, just thankful they narrowly missed landing in the cave's pond - last thing they needed was to be cold AND wet]

...Detritus? Are you okay?

[dontsalute]

Unfortunately not. The temperature is dangerously low here, even for me. While my mind operates at peak efficiency, our bodies are in danger of shutting down from the cold.

1

[can_not_fly]

[The little winged guy standing with Detritus peers at the paper without much conviction of his own. He strains his eyes, making a face of concentration.]

Uhhh... let's see... k, that's totally a k... i... that looks like an n... [Pit is clearly haing to struggle a lot to read as well]

King! That's it. It says "king"!

[dontsalute]

Oh yea, I knew that one.

"By order of der king, this g-"

uh...

["Gathering" is a tricky one, yes.]

[can_not_fly]

[Pit looks at it very carefully, the small angel (who being barely five feet doesn't even reach his waist) needing to stand on his toes to try and read the large scroll]

Uhhh... guuu- no, ga. Ga... thaaa... uggggh. This is hard. Lady Palutena, a little help?

Poor Pit. We really have to get you some time to practice reading, don't we?[Suddenly in response a female, soothing voice comes out of thin air, before a clearly noble lady materializes out of absolutely nowhere right besides Pit.] Let me see that. [She eyes the document quickly] By order of the king... gathering... use of force...

...oh dear. Riot Act? Is this really entirely necessary, do you think, mister Detritus?

[dontsalute]

Is dat what dis is? I thought dis was the new traffic law fing.

[can_not_fly]

I'm afraid it's not, sir Detritus. Perhaps there might have been a mixup at the Watch House?

Uh, Lady Palutena, what's a Riot Act?

Well, Pit, basically, it means that if all these people don't leave before mister Detritus finishes reading it, he's allowed to do any kind of violence he wants on them until they leave.

[That gets a very nervous murmur going around the crowd. A lot more glances are shot at the Piecemaker. There does suddenly seem to be a definite backing component to the random shifting of the mob]

[dontsalute]

[Detritus looks at the crowd, then, in a moment of rare insight, reaches up and puts the safety catch back on the Piecemaker.

Because dat's diplomatics.]